You Are In Charge

“Create a life that feels good on the inside , not one that just looks good on the outside” The truth is at one point or another in ones life they must come face to face with the truth about the quality if the kind of life they have been living. The truth hurts as we all say but sometimes the hurtful truth is just what we need in order to jump into action to make those necessary changes. In life you will come across the people that do not believe they can design their life according to their desires , and there are those that take on the responsibility and somewhere along the line their old way of being is in control of how they are designing their life. The reason why some people never take that leap of faith in creating the life they dream of is not only because they are afraid of the unknown but because they are afraid of being responsible for managing their life and time. Believe it or not for some individuals having a boss makes life easier as it provides them with a sense of order and structure. The facts is that not everyone starts out believing that they are the entrepreneurial type but that does not mean that because you do not believe it at first that it is impossible. It is very important that we are making conscious decisions that is serving our best interest, what do I mean by that ? It is important to have clarity of who you are and where you are mentally. Our ability to thrive after making life changing decisions depends on our mindset,level of maturity and our ability to commit.

Designing the life we love sounds great and at the same time terrifying while everyone desires to be happy and become blessed enough to find something they love or a career that gives them a sense if fulfillment. Making the decision to commit to designing our lives comes with that scary reality of one actually being responsible for their failures. In life you will come in contact with many people who for every downfall in their life they have someone or something to place blame on , which taking a leap of faith does not reward you with that privilege. Our level of success or failure is solely dependent on our level of commitment and ability to show up each and everyday. The saying goes “when the road gets tough the tough gets going” This statement is not in reference to one’s physical strength but their mental strength to be able to experience hardships along the way without throwing in the towel. On the other hand you will find people like myself that are extreme risk takers, always willing to do the very things that they are most afraid of , and fully committed to designing a life that they love that fulfills and grants us a sense of freedom. The problem is ever so often it is very easy to lose sight that you are In charge of your freedom and not allowing our duties on our pursuits of creating the life we desire to rob us of the opportunity to actually enjoy the process. I was hit with the realization just these past two weeks and I had to remind myself that you are in charge of your freedom and happiness. My husband went back to work after being home with us for the last two months and i will admit I became a little spoiled with having the privilege of locking in to work while he assisted with our daughter. Once he went back I realized that in this season of my life on this journey of purpose I would have to get comfortable with extreme flexibility. I had a discussion with my husband about the way I was feeling and you know that harsh truth I spoke about in the beginning was exactly what I got but was also what I needed to hear . His exact words were “ she is not going anywhere so you have to figure out how to make this work for her and you” it was painful to hear but it most certainly brought me back to the reality of why I quit my full time Job to have the freedom to make decisions that served me personally and purposefully.

“Forces Beyond Your Control Can Take Away Everything You Possess Except One Thing, Your Freedom To Choose How You Will Respond To The Situation.

-Viktor Frankl”

The thing about hearing the truth is you have to be open to receiving it and applying it to create a solution and sometimes those adjustments can be temporary and they can also mean doing things differently. I had to get myself out of that routine that I had boxed myself in to feel productive. I will always say I am not the day time nap type but I had to become that type in order to successfully continue to be a present and loving mother and continue to progress and thrive in my purpose. What that looked for me was to temporary commit to being a full time domestic engineer during the day doing a minimum of one work commitment during the day and working the night shift on my very important goals and commitments. The ugly hurtful truth reminded me that I must never lose sight of the fact that I am the CEO of my dreams and at any given time I have to make executive and sometimes difficult decisions that will not only benefit me right now but in the long run. The result of me making this adjustment has rewarded me with more love, joy , and adventures daily with my princess and the ability to maximize my time later feeling full and whole from allowing myself to just be free and flowing. I share this to encourage all my fellow unapologetic souls that are actively and purposefully designing their life to remember that it is okay to breathe. It is okay to change courses and order as long as you remain focused and committed to the goal , but first remember why you got started and it was not to become slaves or prisoners to the dream. Work hard and effectively when it is work time, live out loud and blissfully when it is time to play. We have one life to live and as many opportunities as we receive to start over we do not have the privilege to relive those precious loving and teachable moments on our journey. Reclaim your power and never lose sight of why you got started remember your freedom and happiness is your responsibility.

Greater Is Coming

“Greater is coming” this statement is one that we all have been previewed to many times in our lives especially in the midst of challenging seasons. The real question is how many of us can honestly actually say that they believe this all the time especially when we are currently experiencing a difficult time in our life. The truth is our ability to believe or trust in that statement is measured by our level of faith. If you are an individual that is lacking faith and operating as a hopeless lonely vessel on a journey through life feeling lost, thinking they need to be in control of the outcome of their life you are functioning in fear. Life is not about needing to be in control or having the ability to rewind time, and undo the things we may resent or have regrets on, it is simply about experiencing life challenges and being able to respond versus reacting and learning from them. I believe that every hurt and disappointment we endure teaches us the art of being careful but not fearful moving forward. It is much easier to get stuck in our emotions which encourages us to create limiting and very false stories that does not promote action or evidence that a solution is possible. We spend more time expecting things to go very wrong than the amount of time we invest in paying attention the evidence that there is always something to be thankful for and that after every storm something greater is on the way.

The language we speak over our lives is one that we learn from the time we are born that grows with us into adulthood, we are taught limits, we are taught what is impossible , we are taught to play it safe , we are taught to always seek security and comfort. The truth is there is no greater support or security than the the support and security that God provides for us daily , the things that are unknown or unseen to us is always known and seen by Him, that is the greatest fact we must make a mental note of when ever we are feeling afraid or lost in the midst of our challenges. It is extremely important to keep a memory log for every time you have felt defeated but in the end you saw how it always works out not because of anything you did but by God’s divine intervention to protect and redirect us. The results are often times greater than our expectations, the last week has been one of the most challenging that I have experienced in a long while, and at first I was going through the motions. My emotions were high I felt frustrated , annoyed ,i was in complete reactive mode which I have learned that It is necessary to always allow ourselves to be free to express our feelings weather positive or negative emotions , what we cannot do is allow those negative emotions to linger or begin to make decisions while we are in a low or negative place. Remembering my prior obstacle and how I made it out was one of the ways I managed to regroup , another way of how I was able to get through that was to continue to remind myself that everything is temporary so I should never get so comfortable that I become closed off to the possibility of changes and challenges occurring. We should never get too comfortable and attached to what we know or can see that we have a resistance to God’s plan. Many times He is proactively working to remove some things out of our life to make room for new. The more present I was to these empowering facts the easier it became for me to accept what was happening to adapt and flow the easier it became for me to relax ,trust the process ,and expect that something better is on the way.

“And Jesus Said Unto Them , Because Of Your Unbelief : For Verily I say Unto You, If Ye Have Faith As A Grain Of Mustard Seed, Ye Shall Say Unto This Mountain , Remove Hence To Yonder Place; And It Shall Remove ; And Nothing Shall Be Impossible Unto You.
Mathew 17:20 ”

The breakthrough we are seeking when we are experiencing a difficult season in our life does not come because we are crying about what has happened , our breakthroughs happen when we decide to keep pressing forward with a good attitude as if the outcome we desire has already happened. Although I was very disappointed about my laptop crashing on me which resulted in me not doing work and crushing some of my goals for the week, no I was not happy about that but I received much more than I lost along with learning some valuable lessons. I could remain attached to what I did not get done and how far back I am , but instead I am choosing to be connected to the present opportunities that I have access to that rewards me with opportunities and gifts through this low. The beauty about life is we all have unlimited access to ask for help and receive guidance from God even when we forget to ask. See your life and the events that occurs as a never ending opportunity to increase in our faith, decrease in fear, remove all that is not serving us to receive what we need to learn something new, and also an opportunity to rest and reset. Not only did I receive gifts I was gifted with down time which helped to create momentum in my mind I had a lot to blog about and new ideas to pursue. I encourage you all to always live in gratitude in every season of your life trusting and thanking God in advance for all that He is about to do, but most importantly never give up you may fall, you may stumble, you may rest but losing or quitting is not an option.

Gardener Of The Mind

“Decide What Kind Of Life You Actually Want , Then Say No To Everything That Isn’t That. ”

What are some of the first thoughts that come to mind when you see or think about having a beautiful garden? For me the very first thought I have is the amount of work and commitment it takes to maintain ; like myself I am sure many of you guys can relate. Do I love flowers? Yes but is it a priority for me to have one? Maybe not but it is still one of the most peaceful and beautiful sites to appreciate. As beautiful as a garden is so is the mind, and like the garden the mind needs to be treated with care, consistency and commitment daily in order to bloom beautifully. The truth is unlike the garden which is optional to have the mind is not and should not be optional ,because as we all know the mind is a powerful thing that we cannot afford to waste. It is not only important but critical that we invest time to develop our minds with love, knowledge, and positivity. We are what we think and our thoughts are fueled by a number of things like the things we listen to or watch , our circle of influence , our past experiences, our current circumstances. It is our perception that will dictate how we are responding or reacting to each scenario and our perspectives are fueled by the quality of the soil that we are using to plant in our very own garden of the mind.

The same way I look at the garden and admire its beauty but it instantly intimidated by the work that it takes ,there are many people that are often intimidated by the work that needs be done daily to develop our minds and as unique individuals. I too never really knew the kind of impact,something as simple as a television show can either add value or take away from us until I began to feed my mind with more of what it needed. The more time I invest in planting good seeds in the mind through reading books that spoke to my mind , the more audios I listened to that encouraged me to change my mindset and who I was being , the more mind stimulating conversations I engaged in I realized a few things. One of the first things I quickly recognized was how much my energy shifted not only did it shift but I began to even have more energy through out the day I felt like a weight has been lifted off my shoulder.. I also notice that my interested in the things I spent so much time being entertained with I was slowly but surely losing interest daily , conversations and people I once spent a lot of time with was no longer serving me and the space I was transitioning into. The truth is you never know how bad you were doing or feeling until you start feeling good. The question is how do you begin cultivating the garden of our minds to bloom beautiful flowers of positive thoughts , happiness , purpose , love , true beauty , and wholeness? The first step is to identify why is it important to make this change in your life and asking yourself are you ready and willing to commit to doing the work ?, what are you willing to give up in order to make room to lay new and good soil in your mind?

Life Is happening daily we are met with challenges and changes some welcomed and most of the time unexpected but we still have to learn to adjust and keep moving. I want to encourage each and every one of you reading this today to change the narrative from simply only surviving and getting by but to thrive. No longer will we settle for just making it out let us put ourselves in the position to go through some things growing through and being healed from them. Too often we go through life experiencing trauma or difficulties without taking the necessary steps to get complete with them , to get closure , to release the emotions we feel, instead they are suppressed never addressed until one day we are met with another challenging life changing event and boom we explode. Pressure burst pipes but they also make diamonds,It is our responsibility to decide how we desire to rise out of every adversity we are met with and is it worth it ? Do you acknowledge being a person that is in complete control with how they are going through life experiences peacefully as a priority or a possibility in your life? In order to achieve true success in any area of your life it is important that we are clear on our why and to know how important it is for you to master it. Be open to the daily commitment and practices that will not make life easier but guides us into becoming open minded individuals committed to thriving in life and being gardeners of the mind. We all have the ability to change the things we do not like about ourselves and in our lives but the work begins in the mind and the rest will follow suite. I dare you to get started on your garden find good soil to plant seeds in your life , letting go of what was and being open and welcoming to new possibilities. The key to having a beautiful garden begins with the intention you have , the love you have for this garden before seeing it come to life , and the quality of the soil you are laying your foundation with. Become gardeners of the mind as it makes a difference in the life you are living currently and the life you desire to live.

Proper Risk Management

Looking back at the last few years of my life I can gratefully share that although my life has not been easy or perfect, it has certainly been filled with a lot of great lessons and blessings. I am most proud of the fact that not only did I go through some things, but I grew through them, each time I developed a new skill and awareness that helped me moving forward to make better choices. The experiences we got through in life are not ours to internalize and allow to rob us of experiencing new and fulfilling things to come. Growing up we often hear the warnings like keeping our business to ourselves , do not talk to strangers , no new friends , in all honesty I have grown to realize that  all of those were limits and fears that had nothing to do with us being placed on us.. The idea of staying connected to only the people, places, and things we are familiar with is evidence of living in fear of the unknown by settling for less than we deserve. What we have always known and the things that provides us with comfort will continue to only bring us just that comfort. life is about having fun, taking risks, experiencing challenges, learning and growing from them.  a few years ago at a business conference a very wealthy man said “new solves all “ and when I first heard it  I didn’t fully understand it ,but as I continued on my journey of personal development the more I began to connect with those words more . The places I once attended  frequently did not feel the same then, the people and conversations I once enjoyed and spent a lot of time with no longer interest me the same, which led to me having to make difficult but very necessary selfish decisions.

It is very important that we understand that not everyone that starts with us will finish with us, and secondly to ensure that we never put our faith and trust in men instead try trusting God with our whole heart. The plans we have are subjected to change according to God’s will and plans for us , but the people ,places , things ,and choices we make is our responsibility to ensure that we are not losing more of ourselves but  that there Is always value being added. The road to true success and freedom is never easy but it is always a choice that we have to make and when we do, we must be ready to be all in. The challenge for most comes in understanding that in the beginning it becomes a very lonely and personal walk with you and God and that is okay. I call this the personal development period where much practice of self-love, self-awareness, self-discipline, integrity, and consistency is mastered. To manage our risks of being distracted or knocked off of our square properly trust is key , trusting that although in this moment I may desire to have people on board with me and although I may feel alone I know that I am never alone and that God is preparing me for the people ,places , and things he has in store for me, which  will be worth the wait. The less we try to lean on our own understanding and choose to remain loyal to what we have always know and who we have always known and been we are shifting to being open to allow room for things to be removed , replaced, and we be restored. To not be attached to the things of this world is to be connected to God’s will for our lives.

In closing I want to share these words of encouragement as a reminder of the fact that we have one life to live and it does not matter how long we live, what matters is how we live.  The most powerful choice a person can make is to choose to walk in faith and live with purpose. In everything we do it is important that we do nothing without purpose and great intentions for our lives and always be bold enough to be an example to others, by doing and being the best that we can be. The goal is not perfection, but self-mastery is key and taking steps that brings froth progress daily is choosing to win at life daily. The most important gift a person can give to themselves is to choose to live an unapologetically happy life without regrets or resentment. Do what you feel and love and never apologizing for doing just that, traditions and expectations are meant to be changed and disregarded , what we cannot disregard is the calling on our lives, so never become a prisoner to the script that has been written for you and expected of you to follow. Life is precious and every moment spent living for others is moments we can never get back. Practice proper risk management in your life by not being afraid to take risks to live out loud and pursue your passion but minimize the risk of holding on to seasonal people after their expiration date. staying in places that you have outgrown and playing with your own potential by settling for less or just enough. Rise up every day and make a conscious decision   to not be defeated by life , “no matter what may come I am going to continue to laugh ,to push pass my limits and choose to utilize the power .and gifts that God has blessed me with  to not just survive in life but to thrive in life , love , purpose and adventures. I am practicing proper risk management in my life because I know that there are risks worth taking and risks that can cost me my happiness, my peace, and purpose in life.

“The Only Risks Worth Taking Are The Ones That Push You Further Into Discovering Your Greatness. To Risk Or Compromise Your Freedom. Happiness, And Purpose Is Like Existing Without Reasons To Live.
Shanett McNeill ”

Maximizing Time

“High performers are not born they are conditioned that way by habit.” – Brendon Burchard if someone were to ask you to do you consider yourself to be a high performer what would be your response? Reflecting back on your life and the choices made in the past how would you rate your energy or efforts on a scale of 1-10? What you put in is what you receive in return, what is a high performer?  A high performer is one that decides that they want to be the best at what they are doing. I am firm believer in the power of alignment and focus energy flows where we focus and how we are showing up in one area of our life is how we are showing up in all areas of our life weather we believe it or not. In my experience and observation I have learned that many will miss use the power of choice to fit their desire to be comfortable rather challenged ,meaning that they  invest more time in  the areas that they consider to be there strong suites and avoid the areas in which they consider to be there weakness or in other words the area in which they struggle.  The truth is every area in our life has its own added benefits and purpose and it is our responsibility to be mindful of our attitude, focus and, effort we are putting out daily. Creating and maintaining balance in our life between our spiritual life, work, family, goals, parenting, dating, and marriage can feel like the most difficult thing to master, but just because it appears to be difficult it does not make it impossible. It comes down to a number of things like prioritizing and staying connected and true to our core values and beliefs once we are clear and grounded in that it becomes easier to master discipline to not compromise on those things.

“I do not have time “the number one reason for many why creating balance to make room to thrive in our daily endeavors. The question is what are some of the things that you are spending more time doing that is not in alignment with your goals, or compliment your core values? How much of yourself are you investing in doing for everyone aside from who you are being for yourself?   what are you willing to give up in order to make time for what is important and the things that matter most to you?  The truth is not many are willing to give up on the things that have provided comfort for them , the things that gives them validation or acceptance from others , and doing things takes the focus off of what we know we  should be doing. The road to creating balance in our life and obtaining true fulfilling success is a challenging one and at some point, it can and will get lonely as it is personal so not everyone will be able accept or understand. If we are willing to change things will change, it begins with deciding to value you and working harder on yourself than you do anything else. One very important key to moving closer towards becoming a high performer in your life is to operate in complete gratitude for everything and everyone in every experience or encounter that we have each day. Making small but significant changes in our routine like replacing the thought of what we do not feel like doing today and replacing that with saying “I am grateful for the opportunity to make progress today. replacing the claims that today is a bad day to “today was a day filled with challenges and lessons. Making these simple but powerful adjustments really changes our attitude and replacing complaints with gratitude has the power to shift our energy and promote massive action.

“Abundance Is Not Something We Acquire It Is Something We Tune Into.
Wayne Dyer ”

The ability to be a high performer is a skill that we all possess deep within us, the moment we replace our fears with choosing unbounded faith there is nothing that we cannot get through. Doing the bear minimum is simply not enough our life is filled with great potential and possibilities that requires us to put our best foot forward. Showing up even when we do not feel like it is key to being disciplined in not only our planning but in our actions. It is okay to know what want and to say what we want but it is very important that we pray, plan, and act in order to get one step closer each day to achieving our goals. A dream is just a dream if we are not actively pursuing it, Life and no one owes us anything we owe it to ourselves to go after everything that is ours. In becoming a high performer, I want to encourage you guys to detach from the results that we receive whether they are good are bad because everything is temporary, stay connected to your why and remember that life is happening for us if we allow it to. in everything that you do practice doing it with love , gratitude and high energy, no matter what it is or where you are in life choosing to operate from a space of love and having gratitude for everything helps to create momentum for us. Be empowered daily by surprising yourself with your power and magic to not just exist but to live fully and unapologetically every day of your life. “I am a high performer because I make a commitment to do and be my best self each day and nothing less.